Is Haruhi's bitch. And he loves it.

His username is menial_tasks.

See also: The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya, Elspeth Vimes.

EDIT: He also wishes to copulate with Haruhi on the floor of the SOS Brigade clubroom.

EDIT II: The statement above has been planted there by his enemies.

EDIT 3: What enemies? His sister?

EDIT IV-Revenge of the Page's Owner:He was thinking more of Itsuki. Or that computer club president. Yeah, that's probably it.

EDIT 5, lol Shadow's touched this page: Pfft, Itsuki'd just molest him and the computer club president would be pwn'd by Haruhi.

Edit 6: And he'd love EVERY SECOND OF IT. BECAUSE HARUHI SAID SO, DAMMIT.

Edit VII: ALL PREVIOUS EDITS ARE TO BE DISREGARDED.

EDIT 69: lol, no.

EDIT IX, get the numbers right, damn you: YES. END OF STORY. HAPPILY EVER AFTER WITHOUT EDITS.

EDIT TEN, but numbers are haaaaard: NO. IT'S... ASAKURA TIME.

EDIT XI: NOT ACCORDING TO MY CLOCK. GTFO.