1. "Mansex" was only funny the first hundred times.

8. Axel does not have a bun in the oven.

12. I am not to offer Larxene free breast implants ever again.

13. Roxas does not need help realizing his fantasies.

13-A. Not even in italics.

16: I am never to tell Axel to get over Roxas.

21. I am not allowed to exchange morphine for a ride on the big lizard.

22: I am not allowed to ask Rufus ShinRa why he kept Jenova in his lap for so long, nor to imply that the two of them had a relationship

23. I am not allowed to ask Rufus ShinRa if his ego protected him from the Sister Ray.

24. I am not to click on anything Miri links ever again.

26. Saïx does not get 'that time of the month'.

26-A. At least not in the way I mean.

32. Axel and Roxas are not looking to purchase a new king size bed.

33: I will not make jokes about Kio's special candy.

34. I am not to make 'your mom' jokes at any SHM.

35. You did not make that up in ___ land where you fuck your _______.

39.C. You'll put your eye out.

40. Only Bart gets to fire ze Bart missiles.

42. Not allowed to ask Kadaj if he loves his mommy.

42-A. Nor Dante, Ichigo, or Ed if he loves his daddy.

43: Not allowed to ask if Ed's ride of choice is Mustang

44. Ed does not ride his Mustang all night long.

45. Anderson does not want to baptize your baby.

46. Cuddy does not wish to tell you whether she fucked Greg yet.

48. I am not allowed to lock Saïx and the Superior in a closet together to see if they have hot sex.

48-A. Unless I want to clean up afterward.

48-B: I will not make the suggestion that Saix will have mooncubs or Saixkittens.

50. I should not give Kadaj a box with the word JENOVA scribbled on it.

51. I will not give Axel's hips a polygraph test. They do not lie.

52. I am not to imply that a kooshball is a small fuzzy object.

54: Ed is not too short to type.

55. Glube is no laughing matter.

56. I am not allowed to pitch erectile disfunction drugs at Ed.

58. The following words and phrases are never to be used again, ever: kooshball, Kadaj's mom has got it going on, cockvore, naga, duskbabies, Saïxkittens...

59. I am not allowed to take bets on the Yunalesca/JENOVA catfight.

60. I will quit asking who tops.

65. I will not lose nights of sleep in favor of DDD.

67. I do not want a potion, lol.

69. It is never Goofy Time.

70. I did not bring Sexy back.

71. Someone will lose their virginity. This someone is not you.

75. The words "snakes" and "Sora" are not to be used in the same sentence ever again.

79. Sending Nobodies boxes of heart-shaped candies is not funny.

88. I am not to mention the possibility of Larxene ever having children.

89. I am not to say "Burn Baby" around Axel any more.

96: I will not ask Chazz Michael Michaels what his favorite number is.

97: Or query his sexuality.

98: I am not Will Ferrell.

115. I should not speculate on the penis size of anyone capable of crashing a moon into my planet/summoning Meteor/throwing buildings at me/etc.

220. Albel does not want to pet the pretty dragon.

221. We will never, ever, ever, mention how things happen in DDD.